It's very commonly said that 'when one door closes, another opens'. And true to that, many doors have closed, and many other doors have opened for me as a result. Like how if I hadn't turned down GIP Vietnam, I wouldn't have have had the chance to work with the amazing group of people that is my CI Club. That's just one of the many doors that have opened up as a result of the few others that closed. But no. Today I'm not talking about the things that we gain as a result of the things we've lost. Today I want to ask why some relationships have to die - or at least ween - in order for new relationships to grow.

The thought started when a friend recently got attached, and since then, it's been difficult even just seeing this friend- let alone talking to this friend. That bugged me for a bit, but then I kind of thought about how my own relationships with my old friends waned with the flourishing of my new friendships, and I kind of noticed the trend. Carrie and the girls from Sex and The City constantly talk about never wanting to turn into 'those kinds of people' who disappear the moment they get attached, and I too made that promise (less glamorously, and amidst less champagne) to myself many years ago. We bitch about our disdain for our attached friends because our slight envy at them kind of makes everything more obvious and fun to bitch about, but the truth is that it happens to all of us. Not just in intimate relationships, but even in mere friendships.

Relationships are difficult. They are difficult to start, and all of them are very difficult to maintain. Hell it takes a hell lot of energy and drive to make really important relationships last. And honestly, I am of the opinion that if we were to try to make all of our relationships work out at the same level, we'd be left with a bunch of unfulfilling, superficial relationships.

So yes, the girls from Sex and The City have it right. It's hard to preserve all your relationships, so why not just stick to the people who mean the most to you. And only when you're stable and confident that you have enough of you to share with a life partner, should you go out and find a mate.

I guess when it comes to that friend of mine and me, it's just gonna take alot of work to keep our friendship strong. That, or I'd better start getting comfortable with the idea of not having that friend in my life.