Hello, my name is Mark, and I'm an Obsessor.
So, this may not come as a surprise for many people but it's only recently just comes to terms with it fully. Well, I've always known this about myself but never thought much about it. I always just laughed it off and never gave it much thought.
But the truth is that in the past week, I've obsessed so much about this new show that I'm addicted to that I've completely disregarded my final exams, I've ignored SMSes, emails, people - everything. My whole world revolves round it. I only sleep at four in the morning, I wake up 12 or 1pm in the afternoon and the first thing I do is wolf down about three episodes before I get up to wash up and get lunch. Then I return, and after watching the show all the way till 4am again, I finally take a shower and head to bed before repeating the same cycle the next day.
Yes, this is terrible. But the worst thing is that this isn't just about the show. It's about everything that I decide to obsess about in my life. If it's Hall Production season, I'm up till 4am obsessing about the script, or the staging or costumes etc and then I wake up again - sometimes I don't even sleep for fear of being unable to wake up the next day - later for a 9am class. I once obsessed myself with finding love, and I literally spent days and nights scouring through my friends pages thinking about how it'd be like with each and every single person. And even when I was out of the room and away from the computer, I'd walk around thinking about who's cute, who's hot, and who's great for me or who I'd be great for, and I'd think of absolutely nothing else.
My middle name should really be 'Obsession' or some cool Spanish or French word to make it more sexy and sophisticated. Ugh I could puke at myself right now.
My obsessive nature is ruining my life. If I don't cut it out, I will ruin so many great things in my life. My fire for things ignite so quickly but also die in a flash as well. The only things that haven't died (so far) (thankfully) is love for theatre, advertising and hairstyling.
I've always lived by a principle in relationships - believed la. saying 'lived by' misleadingly makes me sound like I've BEEN in a relationship before - that 'Nothing that starts in a flash ever lasts.' Perhaps I should apply the same principle to life.
This whole tunnel-vision obsession of mine is absolutely destructive. I shall change.
(and yet at the end of this post, when I hit the 'Publish Post' button, I am going to watch my already-buffered show. Despicable me? Oh yes indeed.)
! dug deep in the sand